Noce Blanche (Jean-Claude Brisseau) [11] - Roughly translatable as 'White Wedding', or perhaps more accurately as 'unconsummated relationship', the film promises much: a French teenager (Vanessa Paradis, looking a lot better than in her puppy-fat encrusted, 'Joe le Taxi' days) and the lure of drugs, prostitution and teenage sex. However, the posters fail to mention that they all happened some time before the movie starts and is now engaged in a deep relationship with a married, 50-year old teacher of philosophy. So there are long scenes of them explaining very carefully how they feel, and the film only kicks into gear in the last fifteen minutes when the spurned Vanessa turns nasty. E

It's teenage! It's cute! It's... [Birth certificates on file: all actresses over 16. Er, except Brooke Shields. But she was wearing a body stocking, so it's okay, M'lud...]

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